Ice Cream (My Journey to Food Freedom)

I remember when ice cream terrified me. 

I avoided looking at, thinking about,  talking about, being around 

Ice cream,

Amongst other foods I deemed “off-limits”.

I followed strict rules

Around food,

To be good enough.

My life revolved around

What to eat, when to eat, how much to eat,

And punishing my body when she broke the rules.

I weaved morality into food and eating.

These foods are “good” and “clean”, 

And when I eat them,

So am I. 

But other foods are “bad”, “unclean”,

And when I eat them,

So am I. 

I’m so grateful that I’ve learned that foods aren’t good and bad, 

That my enoughness isn’t tied to eating,

That a smaller body size won’t make me happier,

That food has many different purposes,

That I can trust my body.

I can trust my body.

My body is good,

And I can trust her. 

I eat ice cream now,

When I want and however much I want, 

With joy!

I hope I never forget how big a deal it is

When I choose to eat

Ice cream

And love it.